Legal Posting

Finally got around to reading the details of the Blogger agreement I never read a few years back. Maybe it's an update. Either way, here it is. I might make some money from promoting products or services on this site.

I don't intend to make money from promoting products or services on this site, but I'm supposed to let all three of you, my faithful readers, know this fact.

Now that I have you wondering if I'll finally be buying that penthouse suite overlooking the water near Waikiki Bay. My total 'take' so far from my writing efforts on this blog you wonder? $0.98.

Cost avoided by not paying a shrink to listen to me whine and cry about how hard my life is...

"...and then I had to decide which four cable channels to record at the same time since the crappy high-speed Internet, phone, cable TV system is soooo limited where I live..."


...priceless. (Do I now owe the credit card company I stole that from some sort of royalty?


Garr out.

37 Thoughts on Life, Leadership and Happiness

Thanks for taking the time to read these simple thoughts on life, leadership and happiness. It has taken me forty-eight years and many mistakes to learn the things contained in the following words. Occasionally I will forget what I have learned and have to relearn past lessons.

My parents were my first teachers. They were and are wonderful people. They are my life hero’s and role models. Get me mad and I will channel my mother’s spirited personality. She is an incredibly strong woman. I suggest you do not get me mad—I’m fierce when acting like a strong woman!

Most of the time, I act like a younger version of my father. I’m not as detailed or precise as he is, but I do have the same concern for others and work ethic that approaches, but does not quite equal, his.

I also learned from my siblings. My oldest sister has taught me about grace and strength in difficult times. My brother has taught me to keep in touch with the innocence of that child on the inside of all of us. My youngest sister has shown that me that we should continue to search for happiness until we find it.

My friends, classmates, coworkers, neighbors and even strangers have also contributed to my apprenticeship.

Some of you have helped me learn the things contained in this short message. Some of that help may have come through observation. As a writer, I am always watching people and recording the scene. Later, in the quiet of my own mind I recall then record what I have seen and heard. It’s how you have acted in situations or comments you have made within the range of my eyes and ears that has allowed you to teach me things I would never have known.

I continue to learn lessons. I continue to learn about myself. I encourage you to do likewise.

Finally, I live my life, attempt to lead with mixed results and continuously pursue happiness and contentment.

1.   Most situations are bigger that you think and smaller than you think, simultaneously. It’s all perspective.

2.    Work on things that will last longer than you will live.

3.    Invest in others. Create opportunities for people without experience to get experience. Once, you were without experience. I was a newbie too. Someone gave me an opportunity.

4.    Do not confuse popularity with significance. I would rather be significant to one than popular to a hundred.

5.    Honor those that serve. If they wear a uniform, it is a good chance they are serving. Honor them.

6.    Act like a hero. Think like a servant.

7.    Be nice to people that have nothing to offer you. Karma is a bitch and has a long memory.

8.    Try not to be petty. It makes you look silly and it distracts from the things that are really important.

9.    Family, children, friends—these things matter. Profit, return on investment, not so much.

10.   Work sucks. Try to make it suck less for those around you.

11.   You can’t un-ring the bell, but you can apologize.

12.   Challenge authority. Respect authority. I know it is difficult. Life is complicated. Do your best.

13.   No one is perfect. You are included in this club. I’m a founding member.

14.   Do something for someone that will never know you did it for them.  Don’t tell anyone. Over time, you will forget that you did it. The universe will not forget.

15.   Deescalate most difficult situations. In extremely rare exceptions, use all the force necessary to reach a conclusion.

16.   Everyone discriminates. I choose to use stupidity and lack of compassion as the criteria I use. What do you use?

17.   You don’t need to be acknowledged to act compassionately.

18.   Make an effort to listen to those that have a different opinion than you.

19.   Think larger than your personal limits. It’s OK for this to make you feel uncomfortable. It is not OK for you to use this as an excuse for not taking action.

20.   Do what you can to make your successor, replacement, stand-in or alternate successful. It is honorable to help them to be more successful that you were. This does not make you a failure, it make you a success.

21.   Appearance matters. I find this annoying. Please forgive me.

22.   Develop people before they are ready.

23.   Go for the red rope. (Don’t understand this one? Call me. I’d be glad and honored to share the story.)

24.   Likert scale scores less than 5 are like gold. Be thankful for them.

25.   Have fun. Let other have fun. Create opportunities where fun can happen. Fun is not a bad thing.

26.   You are never too old to look up to a young person.

27.   Surround yourself with people smarter than you.

28.   Surround yourself with people that fill in your skill gaps.

29.   Encourage your staff to challenge your opinions. Encourage this. Welcome this. Embrace this. Sometimes you might be wrong and they will be right.

30.   It is your responsibility to make whoever you report to look good. Sometimes this will require that you disagree with them. (See item #29 for clarification.)

31.   Lighten up dude. Seriously, the end will come soon enough. Enjoy the ride while you can.

32.   Position does not imply competence.

33.   Admit when you are wrong. Sooner rather than later.

34.   Compliment more often than you correct.

35.   Your success does not take away from my success.

36.   Get a passport. Use it.

37.   Make a big splash in the deep end of someone’s pool.

As I live my life I have had to relearn some of these things. Now this list will make it easier for me to review so that I do not so easily forget.

When You Can't Say What You Want to Say

This happens to me a lot. I can't say what I'm thinking. The reasons vary. Societal norms, a desire to stay employed, a concern for the feelings of my friends, family, business associates and the general public--all are valid reasons why my "thought-to-enunciated-words" filter kicks in.

I have a good friend that is not limited by her internal filter. She's a good person. But she is not hindered by the sort of thinking processes that I have to deal with. So her filter is engaged rarely. Mine is usually working overtime.

As an example a few things that I either said or written as a way to stay employed, not upset coworkers or challenge societal norms, I have included a small sampling of these filtered phrases below. I will allow you to perform the translation into English. Let me know what you think my intended message was. Enjoy!

1. "He was talking out of the wrong end of his anatomy."
2. "I hope we can avoid an unschedule highspeed airplane, lowspeed ground, interface event."
3. "[Female coworker's name], I hope none of this particulate-infused, colloidal mass of an email splashes onto you."
4. "I believe his understanding of the subject has given him an opportunity for additional learning activity."

What do you say  when you can't say what you want to say?

Bad Training Events

Have you ever attended a bad training event? No, I mean a BAD TRAINING EVENT? I've had just such an experience. It's at a place I worked at before. Returning means that I get to experience all the new employee, on-boarding stuff that you would normally expect--exit the building if it is on fire, don't surf for porn on the company equipment, try not to show up hungover too often--you know, the standard stuff the have to tell you in order to keep the insurance costs down.

Well I have a new record for bad training. It was so bad that I'm compelled the share the badness as a way of purging it from my memory. The training was for all employees. Correction, it was for all employees that had not already attended the training with their departments, so yeah, I was with all the losers.

The training was actually an e-learning video-type event projected on the screen so that we could all suffer together. E-learning--projected for a group--together. I think the underlying goal was to create a common enemy in the form of the HR department. Mission accomplished.

While suffering through the training I became distracted. And began to doodle. Then began to write. Doodle induced writing is never a good thing with me. It has caused me trouble in the past. I predict it will cause me trouble in the future. I think of it as a way to maintain my sanity when presented with overwhelming levels of stupidity.

This is what I wrote, slightly edited to protect the guilty parties.

This is the worst training I have ever experienced. Well, there was that one training event back at [redacted]. It was during my time on the shop floor. I was a Saw and Shear Operator II and the training topic was safety. The instructor's name was Jim "Three Fingers" Wilson. As his nickname implies, he only had three fingers on his right hand. Though I was never told directly, the rumor in the workplace grapevine was that he lost them in a nasty workplace accident. I think they said it involved a press break.

As the training progressed, 'Three Fingers' would raise his crushed appendage and shout out comments such as, "See what I mean?", while pointing with his good left hand.

I doubt many of us remember any specifics of the training. We were too traumatized and shocked. To my last days I will remember that trainer and his mangled hand.

So to be clear, this recent on-boarding, new hire collecting e-learning training, where I learned to exit a burning building, to avoid porn surfing on the clock and to not ever show up hungover was a new record that surpassed the previous high mark, err, low mark I mean.