Thanks for taking the time to read these simple thoughts on life, leadership and happiness. It has taken me forty-eight years and many mistakes to learn the things contained in the following words. Occasionally I will forget what I have learned and have to relearn past lessons.
My parents were my first teachers. They were and are wonderful people. They are my life hero’s and role models. Get me mad and I will channel my mother’s spirited personality. She is an incredibly strong woman. I suggest you do not get me mad—I’m fierce when acting like a strong woman!
Most of the time, I act like a younger version of my father. I’m not as detailed or precise as he is, but I do have the same concern for others and work ethic that approaches, but does not quite equal, his.
I also learned from my siblings. My oldest sister has taught me about grace and strength in difficult times. My brother has taught me to keep in touch with the innocence of that child on the inside of all of us. My youngest sister has shown that me that we should continue to search for happiness until we find it.
My friends, classmates, coworkers, neighbors and even strangers have also contributed to my apprenticeship.
Some of you have helped me learn the things contained in this short message. Some of that help may have come through observation. As a writer, I am always watching people and recording the scene. Later, in the quiet of my own mind I recall then record what I have seen and heard. It’s how you have acted in situations or comments you have made within the range of my eyes and ears that has allowed you to teach me things I would never have known.
I continue to learn lessons. I continue to learn about myself. I encourage you to do likewise.
Finally, I live my life, attempt to lead with mixed results and continuously pursue happiness and contentment.
1. Most situations are bigger that you think and smaller than you think, simultaneously. It’s all perspective.
2. Work on things that will last longer than you will live.
3. Invest in others. Create opportunities for people without experience to get experience. Once, you were without experience. I was a newbie too. Someone gave me an opportunity.
4. Do not confuse popularity with significance. I would rather be significant to one than popular to a hundred.
5. Honor those that serve. If they wear a uniform, it is a good chance they are serving. Honor them.
6. Act like a hero. Think like a servant.
7. Be nice to people that have nothing to offer you. Karma is a bitch and has a long memory.
8. Try not to be petty. It makes you look silly and it distracts from the things that are really important.
9. Family, children, friends—these things matter. Profit, return on investment, not so much.
10. Work sucks. Try to make it suck less for those around you.
11. You can’t un-ring the bell, but you can apologize.
12. Challenge authority. Respect authority. I know it is difficult. Life is complicated. Do your best.
13. No one is perfect. You are included in this club. I’m a founding member.
14. Do something for someone that will never know you did it for them. Don’t tell anyone. Over time, you will forget that you did it. The universe will not forget.
15. Deescalate most difficult situations. In extremely rare exceptions, use all the force necessary to reach a conclusion.
16. Everyone discriminates. I choose to use stupidity and lack of compassion as the criteria I use. What do you use?
17. You don’t need to be acknowledged to act compassionately.
18. Make an effort to listen to those that have a different opinion than you.
19. Think larger than your personal limits. It’s OK for this to make you feel uncomfortable. It is not OK for you to use this as an excuse for not taking action.
20. Do what you can to make your successor, replacement, stand-in or alternate successful. It is honorable to help them to be more successful that you were. This does not make you a failure, it make you a success.
21. Appearance matters. I find this annoying. Please forgive me.
22. Develop people before they are ready.
23. Go for the red rope. (Don’t understand this one? Call me. I’d be glad and honored to share the story.)
24. Likert scale scores less than 5 are like gold. Be thankful for them.
25. Have fun. Let other have fun. Create opportunities where fun can happen. Fun is not a bad thing.
26. You are never too old to look up to a young person.
27. Surround yourself with people smarter than you.
28. Surround yourself with people that fill in your skill gaps.
29. Encourage your staff to challenge your opinions. Encourage this. Welcome this. Embrace this. Sometimes you might be wrong and they will be right.
30. It is your responsibility to make whoever you report to look good. Sometimes this will require that you disagree with them. (See item #29 for clarification.)
31. Lighten up dude. Seriously, the end will come soon enough. Enjoy the ride while you can.
32. Position does not imply competence.
33. Admit when you are wrong. Sooner rather than later.
34. Compliment more often than you correct.
35. Your success does not take away from my success.
36. Get a passport. Use it.
37. Make a big splash in the deep end of someone’s pool.
As I live my life I have had to relearn some of these things. Now this list will make it easier for me to review so that I do not so easily forget.
